I don’t know about you, but I can relate …
“My chief and abiding trial lies within; and I hope that the Lord will sanctify it — to make me by degrees ‘little’ in my own eyes. I long to be able to use Job’s words, with the same feeling as I believe Job had when he spoke them, “Behold, I am vile!” (Job 40:4.)
The acknowledgment in words is quite easy — but really and in good earnest to “abhor myself” and repent in dust and ashes — is most difficult. I know that I ought to be humbled before Him — but I want to be so indeed. But that monster SELF has as many heads as a Hydra — and as many lives as a cat! It is more than 25 years since I hoped it was fast nailed to the cross — but alas, it is still very much alive — and still mixing with, and spoiling everything I do! ”
“(N.B. A ‘Hydra’ is a mythical multi-headed monster, whose heads re-grew after they were cut off.)”
Letters of John Newton, 1775
HT: GraceGems
Absolutely!
I battle this Monster daily, my dear sister. These are encouraging words from Spurgeon, though, for they remind me to press on and cling to my Savior. They remind me that my brothers and sisters in Christ face the same battle, too. How amazing is His grace! Love and hugs to you, sweet Christina.
This is indeed a battle for me as well, the ugly head of ‘self’ rears up repeatedly and I feel so ashamed when convicted. This should be read daily.
Blessings to you dear sister, you are an encouragement from the Lord…all glory going to Him.
Dear Christina, I thank you for this quote quote and for reminding me where my chief abiding trial lies. I struggled to express this truth in words all week. Self is oft, if not the ugliest and most mischievous monster of all! Thank God for His abiding love and grace! Blessings sweet friend!
Yes, yes, yes. This is so painfully true. Praise God for mercy and grace!
“Behold, I am vile!” (Job 40:4.)…. God help me! Thanks Sis
Can we even imagine what God could do through us to advance His kingdom if we’d just get out of the way?
Lovely post Christina.
Thanks everyone for taking the time to read and comment. It’s good to remind ourselves that the battle that we are in is not unique to us at all. All of us who are a new creation in Christ, have throughout the generations struggled to keep SELF nailed to that tree!