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These Inward Trials by John Newton

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I asked the Lord, that I might grow
In faith, and love, and every grace;
Might more of His salvation know,
And seek more earnestly His face.

I hoped that in some favored hour
At once He’d answer my request,
and by His love’s constraining power
Subdue my sins, and give me rest.

Instead of this, He made me feel
the hidden evils of my heart;
And let the angry powers of hell
Assault my soul in every part.

Yea more, with His own hand He seemed
Intent to aggravate my woe;
Crossed all the fair designs I schemed,
Blasted my gourds, and laid me low.

‘Lord, why is this?’ I trembling cried,
`Wilt thou pursue Thy worm to death?’
`This in this way,’ the Lord replied,
`I answer prayer for grace and faith.

These inward trials I employ
From self and pride to set thee free;
And break thy schemes of earthly joy,
That thou mayst seek thy all in Me.’

John Newton, 1791

Comments

  1. Thanks for publishing this, Christina. This is one of the greatest poems, to help one understand the inner battle of the Christian life.

    Many (even Christians) can not appreciate the true comfort it brings, to a person dogged by their failures, which still take place now, as a person of faith. It is, I think, a good commentary on Romans 7, and the problem of indwelling sin, which goes on, until the grave. Cheers.

    • Hi there,

      Thank you so much for your comment. You know, I read this poem today for the first time ever and was struck by the “realness” of it. It encourages my faith. Even the lowest pits and darkest depths are subject to God’s eternal and loving purposes. Thanks again for your comment.

  2. “O to grace how great a debtor
    Daily I’m constrained to be!
    Let Thy goodness, like a fetter,
    Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
    Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
    Prone to leave the God I love;
    Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
    Seal it for Thy courts above.”

      • Yepper…
        Tim is right; this is a song from long ago entitled “Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing” with lyrics here.

        What strikes me about this verse is the seemingly antithesis of being indebted to grace, which defies its very nature (meaning “unearned/unmerited favor”). Yet, that is what God’s grace does to us and in us…it spurs us on to serve God with our whole being not because we have to but because we want to. Hence, our eternal indebtedness to grace. Newton, more than most, understood this beautiful angst.

  3. Thank you, Christina

    You have no idea how timely this poem is for me.

    Blessings,
    Lisa

      • allways,will do… not to worry…”Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving make your requests known to God. And the peace that passes all understanding will guard your hear and mind in Christ Jesus.” Phill. 4:6-7, and about the time I finish quoting that to myself…that “peace” flows over me.

  4. I needed to read that this morning. Thanks for posting the poem. I can identify intensely with the message. It seems that I am being attacked in every area of my life. It is as if all hell has broken loose. Even my desire for Christ has dimmed. I have seemingly lost my way. It is as though all I do is attempt daily to make the ends meet only to fall futher behind the “eight ball.” Meanwhile those few friends and loved ones that surround me seem oblivious to my inner spiritual turmoil. I know it is a stripping in my life of all but Him but I don’t know if I can survive it. I have lost the church I loved, a pastor I respected, friends ( I thought they were). I could go on and on but then it would be too personal for this blog. I know all the right things to say and do for others over the years who found themselves in this situation but those sayings seem so contrite and empty in the midst of this storm.
    So I don’t ask for words from you or others, only your prayers.

    By the way, Paul posted the lines for a song we used to sing when we were growing up. Can’t remember the title.